A BEDTIME STORY

Valerie wrote this little story back in 1994 and gave it to me as I was going on a business meeting out of town. It was in a envelope with the simple title "A BEDTIME STORY". Valerie was coy about giving me this story to read while I was out of town. It was her way of making me realize what was happening between us. At least that was my impression as I read the story that night in the hotel room. I was in awe of Valerie's ability to write such a magical story so filled with the wonder of life and love. I still am and always will be. 






                                                    A BEDTIME STORY

Long ago, in a deep wood that exists now only in bedtime stories, a young boy made his home in the hollow trunk of the very last korami tree. In fact, that the trunk was hollow tells that the tree was dying already. The story goes that the tree became hollow on the day it stretched in massive branches out in all directions and, for the first time, could not touch the branches of another korami. The good fortune for the boy was that the tree was so large, the trunk so sturdy and the fruit on its highest branches so plentiful, that it could shelter and feed him for as long as he lived before it softly crashed to earth (as it did during an awesome and beautiful storm) a century after this tale begins. Because he was alone and wished to choose his own fate, he left the name he had been given (now long forgotten) behind, like a discarded manto shell. He chose to think of himself as Kor Ami and he chose to believe that this meant "strong and forever true". 

Other boys lived in the deep wood, but none was so simply wise as Kor Ami. "What would be the true thing to do", he asked himself. It was the thing that kept him apart from the others. He did this when other boys watched the old woman's hut to steal a piece of the fine cloth she wove from the silky grass near the waterfall. He did this when he choose to gathr the ripe fruit from his tree instead of joining in the hunt. He did this the very first time he saw the girl.

She was alone in the wood, and young to be so. She did not look afraid. He thought she was lost because he did not know her and he knew every one. She walked fast but he thought she walked without direction. He slipped silently from his branch, a soft thud that landed beside her. "Where do yo go"? he asked. She smiled, but stepped back twice, so that his arms could not touch her. "I go to ---- of the wood, to the other side", she said. She was of lansai, the 
mountain; he knew this from her speech. "There is no other side," he laughed. "There is only 
the wood, this is the only place." She started off on her unmarked path without a word and he beside her easily keeping pace with her quickening steps.

They started through the wood, and he thought "She is wrong. There is nothing more than what I have, my tree, my wood." She thought, "he knows only what he sees. Let him leave me. Let me walk alone if he will try to stop me." But they walked together. He said, softly so that she heard his breath but not his words, "What would be the true thing to do?" He ventured to walk beside her through the wood, to prove that he was right.

They walked together and talked. She found that his heart carried dreams of places as her's did. She saw in his face a light as the light that parts the trees after rain. She found song in his words like wind in the leaves. Though he followed beside her, he begand to see her path. Her voice was a scent on the wind that drew him to her. He heard her stories of the other side and they became paart of his dreams. They stoppped near a pond and knew that she no longer lead, but they walked together. When they kissed, their arms wrapped about the other tightly, as if to let nothing come between them.

And she, because she wished to choose her own fate, left the name that she had been given (now long forgotten) behind, shaking it off like the dust from the kyper blossom. She choose to think of herself as Lan Sai and she chose to believe that this meant "strong and forever 
true".

They never found the other side, though they never stopped walking. In their search they came upon his tree and her mountain many times.  In their search they came again and again into each others arms, tightly to let nothing come between them. In their search they found many of the things they looked for in the light of the other's eyes and the song of the other's voice. And though no one led, they walked always ahead, together, strong and forever true. 


Valerie Jane

Sometimes you gotta know what to say!

Guy: Val, did you have some chocolate?

Val: no!

Guy: Do you like chocolate Val?

Val: Yes!

Guy: A lot?

Val: Yes, a lot!

Sometimes you gotta know what to say!

Chocolate, Kisses and Changes

Almost everyday Valerie has her favorite food... Chocolate.  We give her chocolate kisses, chocolate cookies, chocolate pudding... if it has chocolate, Valerie will want some.

When we give her a chocolate kiss, most of the time, we put it in her hand and she is able to put it in her mouth. No other food has that effect on Valerie's ability to eat. Yes, we have to feed her now. She has a great appetite.

It was Valerie's birthday last month. June 18th. She shares that birth date with Paul McCartney. We had a party and yes, there was lots of chocolate. Valerie loved the chocolate Ice Cream cake and chocolate cup cakes that her sister Ilona brought over.  Valerie turned 62 last June 18th.

 Two years ago, 2011, on June 18th, Valerie was in the hospital after a bad UTI. When Valerie came out of that hospital, two years ago, she no longer walked. So she has been bed bound for two years now. It doesn't seem like two years, but it is.

The changes in the house since then are major. A hospital bed in the living room. A day bed to sleep on right next to Valerie's hospital bed.  A nice recliner for Valerie to sit in during the day. A Hoyer lift. Our bedroom is now one of Valerie's supply stations. 

And Valerie's decline in being able to speak with her beautiful voice. That is a profound change. I would give up my right, and left hand for her to be able to talk to me like she used to. That was our whole life, talking to each other.

Every night when we get Valerie ready for bed, there's a lot of turning her on the hospital bed. My bad back is bad. I talk to Valerie and ask her how everyone in the family is doing. How's your Mom Val? How's Alexis doing Valerie? Hey how's your brother Alan doing? (She almost always repeats her oldest brother Alan's name.) How's, Julia, Bill, Dianne, Danny, Geri, Karen, Peter and Karen, Steve, Joel, Kathy and Ken.... etc...

I do this so that Valerie at least hears all their names every day. It also helps distract her from the fact that she needs help getting ready for bed. Something that the most independent person I have ever known, really hates! Every blue moon she'll call my name, "Guy?" I'm right here Val. "oh!" says Valerie.

Last night, another change. I'm holding on to her, as I've turned her on her side. I ask her if she's alright. At this point, Valerie tenderly kisses my forearm. "Val, you kissing me?"   "Yes!"  For all the heartache I feel on a daily basis, that Valerie has the horrid Alzheimer's Disease, that almost moved me to tears of joy. It was Valerie the way I have always known her, the kindest, sweetest woman I have ever known. That is sweeter than chocolate for me!